In recovery, it’s easy to focus on what’s broken—our past mistakes, the damage done, and the struggles ahead. Traditional therapy often centers on fixing what isn’t working. But true, lasting change requires more than just correcting weaknesses—it demands recognizing and utilizing our strengths.
The Transtheoretical Model from the University of Rhode Island reshaped how we understand behavior change, emphasizing that self-efficacy—our belief in our ability to change—is critical in maintaining sobriety. Simply put, if you don’t believe you can succeed, the road to recovery becomes much harder.
Psychologist Martin Seligman, a pioneer of positive psychology, found that people who identify and actively use their character strengths are more resilient in the face of challenges like anxiety, depression, and addiction. They also report greater life satisfaction, success in their goals, and overall happiness. When we focus on what we do well—rather than what we lack—we set ourselves up for long-term sobriety and personal growth.
How to Discover and Use Your Strengths
To apply this key to recovery, I recommend engaging in a daily strength-awareness practice. The VIA Character Strengths framework identifies 24 strengths—such as bravery, perseverance, kindness, and wisdom—that each of us possess to varying degrees.
Here’s how to integrate your strengths into daily life:
Pick One Strength Per Day – Each morning, choose one character strength to focus on. If you struggle to recognize your own, ask a close friend or sponsor what they see in you.
Watch for It, Use It – Throughout the day, look for moments to apply your chosen strength. If you focus on perseverance, notice how you push through cravings. If you choose kindness, look for ways to be compassionate to yourself and others.
Reflect on It – At the end of the day, take a few minutes to think about how you used that strength and how it made you feel. Did it make a difference? Did you feel more capable?
This simple practice not only builds confidence but also strengthens your commitment to sobriety and the purpose you discovered in Key One.
The Power of Positive Influence and Self-Talk
Recovery is a lot like running an ultramarathon. There will be times when exhaustion and doubt creep in, when the temptation to give up feels overwhelming. In those moments, we have to remind ourselves that we are capable. Research shows that even simple self-affirmations like “I can do this” significantly boost endurance and performance.
Additionally, the people we surround ourselves with play a huge role in our success. Studies show that if we spend time with five high-performing, positive individuals, our own performance improves by 15%. But if we’re around even one consistently negative or toxic person, our performance drops by 30%.
Our brains are wired to notice the negative more than the positive—it’s a survival instinct. That’s why it takes deliberate effort to focus on what is good and strong within us.
Who Are You at Your Best?
A powerful exercise in building self-efficacy is to ask yourself:Who am I when I am at my very best?
Write this down in different areas of your life:
As an employee – What qualities make you a strong worker?
As a family member – How do you show up as a sibling, parent, or partner?
In your recovery – What does your strongest, most committed self look like?
Reflecting on these questions reinforces your sense of self-worth and helps you see that you are more than your past. You have strengths. You have value. You are capable of lasting change.
Strength Builds Strength
The more you recognize and use your strengths, the more confident you become in your ability to stay sober. Over time, this self-efficacy becomes the foundation of your recovery, empowering you to push through challenges, resist cravings, and live with purpose.
You are stronger than you think. Start noticing it, using it, and believing it.
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